NEAL'S PICKS PALATIAL HEADQUARTERS -- After a disastrous week of picks, we at Neal's Picks took a deep look at the interns that are researching each week's slate of games.

What we discovered was the lead intern, Elsa, has been claiming football research hours but instead spending those hours at a massage parlor. During questioning, Elsa claimed she has had "lower back issues" for months, adding that only deep-tissue massage could alleviate the pain enough for her to focus on forecasting football scores.

Upon questioning the other interns, we discovered no evidence to support Elsa's claims, so after days worth of discussions and negotiations, we have terminated Elsa, effective immediately.

We are promoting another intern, Isabelle, to the role of interim lead intern. We are also launching a national search for a new lead intern to help Neal's Picks return to its rightful place atop the RebelGrove.com football predicting hierarchy. Last place is unacceptable, and we will do what it takes to hire the interns who can end this embarrassing performance that has overtaken Neal's Picks over the past few seasons.

We thank Elsa for her time and wish her _ and her "ailing back" _ well in her future endeavors and we pledge to help Isabelle while she temporarily guides us through the remainder of this season.

Isabelle is a local girl. Her love of Neal's Picks is unquestioned. She's a good girl, loves her mama. She loves horses and her boyfriend too. She'll do well until we find a qualified replacement at the end of our intense, national search.

Frankly, it's been liberating this week with Elsa gone. The air is clear. It's kind of an us-against-the-world feeling as we try to take down Jeffrey, Chase, Zach and everyone else out there who doesn't believe in us. All of the establishments around Neal's Picks Palatial Headquarters have publicly expressed their belief in Isabelle.

It's almost like all of us here at Neal's Picks are family now. We're not blood, but dammit, it feels like family. The sense of community is intoxicating.

That alone should be enough to get us to the top.

On to the picks...

Last Week:

Neal McCready: 7-2 overall, 3-6 ATS

Chase Parham: 6-3 overall, 3-6 ATS

Jeffrey Wright: 6-3 overall, 4-5 ATS

Zach Berry: 6-3 overall, 4-5 ATS

For The Season:

Neal McCready: 37-8 overall, 17-19 ATS

Chase Parham: 35-10 overall, 18-18 ATS

Jeffrey Wright: 36-9 overall, 19-17 ATS

Zach Berry: 35-10 overall, 19-17 ATS

No. 23 Texas A&M (-23) vs. Arkansas, AT&T Stadium, Arlington, Texas, 11 a.m., ESPN

Neal McCready: Goodness gracious, Arkansas is bad. Chad Morris is quickly putting himself on a hot seat in Year 2 in Fayetteville. He needs a win soon. I can't see him getting one in this spot. Neal's Pick: Texas A&M 38, Arkansas 10

Chase Parham: I'm sticking with my principle to not pick Arkansas to cover any line. It seems like a sound strategy. Parham's Pick: A&M 45, Arkansas 10

Jeffrey Wright: This line reeks. Texas A&M has 83-percent of the money on them to cover, and the line has’t moved. Ever since this game moved to Jerry’s World, A&M has blown Arkansas out just once (2016), and they wouldn’t have covered this number. Also, this game has gone to overtime three-out-of-the-five games played there. I’ll take the points. Wright’s pick: Texas A&M 38, Arkansas 17

Zach Berry: I don’t think the rivalry matters much here. Zach’s Pick: Texas A&M 41, Arkansas 13

Northern Illinois (+6.5) at Vanderbilt, 11 a.m., SEC Network

Neal McCready: Vanderbilt's offense did some things against LSU and should be able to do some things against a Huskies team that was, per my Siri, subjugated by Nebraska last week. Neal's Pick: Vanderbilt 35, Northern Illinois 17

Chase Parham: It's very on brand for Vanderbilt that it scored in the 30s and still lost by the same amount. The Commodores, seriously, may be looking ahead to the Rebels. Parham's Pick: Vanderbilt 27, Northern Illinois 21

Jeffrey Wright: The same logic applies in this game. Northern Illinois isn’t good. However, I can’t ignore the fact that 83-percent of the money is on Vanderbilt, and Vegas hasn’t blinked. Give me the points. Wright’s pick: Vanderbilt 24, NIU 20

Zach Berry: The Huskies are a proud program and Vanderbilt is coming off a weird one where they scored 38 on LSU, give me the Commodores. Zach’s Pick: Vanderbilt 27, Northern Illinois 16

Ole Miss (+35) at No. 2 Alabama, 2:30 p.m., CBS:

Neal McCready: How top heavy is the SEC these days, you ask? Well, this game is going to be highlighted to a national network audience. Tua Tagovailoa should have a field day. I just don't see a scenario where it's even close. Neal's Pick: Alabama 56, Ole Miss 17

Chase Parham: Ole Miss is averaging five points per game against Alabama the past two seasons. Alabama has broken 50 in each of those games. The line has jumped up to 38 by now, and 35 feels like a bargain considering the huge discrepancy in seasons to this point. Parham's Pick: Alabama 55, Ole Miss 13

Jeffrey Wright: Uh, lay them. Lay them in the first quarter. Lay them in the first half, and then lay them in the game. Wright’s pick: Alabama 56, Ole Miss 13

Zach Berry: It’ll be nice to hear Brad Nessler and Gary Danielson, right? Zach’s Pick: Alabama 59, Ole Miss 14

Towson (No line) at No. 9 Florida, 3 p.m. CDT, SEC Network:

Neal McCready: Florida has some fascinating games upcoming. This is not one of those games. Neal's Pick: Florida 52, Towson 7

Chase Parham: Oh, whatever. Parham's Pick: Florida 48, Towson 9

Jeffrey Wright: Florida is the peak Dan Mullen team. They’re somehow undefeated, they haven’t played a clean game yet, and you’re not quite sure how they score. Also, you’re pretty sure they’re not good, but you can’t say for certain. Wright’s pick: Florida 52, Towson 3

Zach Berry: GO GATA! Zach’s Pick: Florida 44, Towson 12

Mississippi State (+11) at No. 7 Auburn, 6 p.m., ESPN:

Neal McCready: Auburn got to 4-0, silencing all of the Malzahn talk for now. Further, the Tigers' defense is legit. Neal's Pick: Auburn 27, Mississippi State 13

Chase Parham: I've been underselling Auburn all year, so let's go in another direction. MSU has some offensive uncertainty and that's not a good sign against the Tigers. Auburn is very legitimate on defense. A State win would be fun for the Gus storyline, though. Parham's Pick: Auburn 31, State 17

Jeffrey Wright: Auburn is the better team, but never doubt Malzahn’s ability to allow a backdoor cover. The backdoor is always open with Malzahn. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve bet on him and went to the half counting my money only to watch him forget to shut the door. Auburn will control the game from start to finish but somehow won’t cover. Wright’s pick: Auburn 27, Mississippi State 17

Zach Berry: On The Plains? This is a no-brainer. Derrick Brown and that defense are going to be too much for whoever lines up under center for the Bulldogs. Zach’s Pick: Auburn 36, Mississippi State 17

Kentucky (+4) at South Carolina, 6:30 p.m. CDT, SEC Network:

Neal McCready: Both teams are coming off poor performances on the road, so I'll just be safe here and go with the home team. Neal's Pick: South Carolina 27, Kentucky 21

Chase Parham: Both teams are inconsistent and unpredictable. So I'll take the points and see what happens. Parham's Pick: Kentucky 20, South Carolina 17

Jeffrey Wright: I trust South Carolina’s quarterback more than I trust Kentucky’s, and Muschamp is 3-1-1 at South Carolina as a small favorite at home. Wright’s pick: South Carolina 20, Kentucky 14

Zach Berry: South Carolina made some pivotal mistakes last week on the road. I am interested to see how they respond at home in a winnable game. Both are reeling. Give me the home team. Zach’s Pick: South Carolina 27, Kentucky 20